Has Your Relationship or Lack Thereof with Your Father Affected Your Role as a Man?

Having a father and having a relationship with a father is two different things. My father was in my house, but mentally he was somewhere else. He seemed to find time for everyone but his family. And now that he is older, he wants to play catch up. He missed proms, father-daughter dances, graduations, and learning about us. But it's too late and the bar is closed. I don't mean to sound bitter, but it is a genuine thought. Me and my sister's are in our 20s, 30s, and 40s respectively, I mean what are you going to do? Take us out for ice cream?

While my sisters and I remain cordial, it is hard to try and connect with someone who has missed out on half of your life. I think perhaps if he had not been there at all it would have been easier to deal. You can't miss what you never had, right? I know so many people who have had issues with their fathers not being there. They go above and beyond the call of duty with their kids just to make sure they don't experience the same fate. Then there are those who simply disregard fatherhood and blame the mother for "having a kid" to spite him. Well, you should've strapped up if you didn't want a kid and it isn't their fault. Make lemonade with the so-called lemons you get. Black children need their fathers waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more than other folks. The majority of our households are run by single women, and that is not a good look.